Spring!

Easter was always one of Mom’s favorite holidays. When we were little she made us new (and matching) outfits. We were allowed to eat store-bought sweets. We got presents (our first-ever CD boombox—hooray!), instead of Easter baskets. If we didn’t drive the country road for dinner with Grandma and Grandpa, Mom would go all-out at our house; we’d wake up to the smell of baking ham, or baking bread, or baking pie and rush out to the kitchen. It was surprising then, the year that Mom decided to non-ironically make rabbit. We’d had it before. Family friends lived on a commune and raised/butchered their own. It was good—juicy, tender, not-gamey—so long as you could forget about the hoppity-hop and the cotton-tail. On Easter, however, the chocolate bunny at the center of the table made it impossible to forget. Mom is, sometimes, oblivious to things such as this; she’s also got an impish streak that defies interpretation. I’m not sure which compelled her to make rabbit but I do remember her being surprised at the amount leftover.

Because I am away from home and stricken with my own adolescent sense of humor, Penny and I are having a maple-glazed bone-in pork butt (ham) for dinner. It’s cheaper than other hams (yay!) and permits me to yell “bone-in pork butt” and “haunch” while preparing it. This makes me very happy. The menu consisted of a Lutheran's food dreams come true: ham, mashed/whipped potatoes, roasted vegetables, and lemon bars. Follow me, for fellowship, to the church basement: mmmmm, coffee and bars.

Ham-Fisted
Preparations began the night before, when we first glazed the ham with maple syrup, from a flask.

The next day, I slathered more maple syrup on all surfaces, then loaded it into a 325 degree oven where it baked, covered with foil, for 25-30 minutes for each pound.

With about 30 minutes of baking time remaining, I rubbed dark brown sugar onto the bone-in pork butt and removed the foil, so the sugar would get all crinkly on top. When I pulled it out (after 3 hours of baking time) it looked like this:


Sides
For the mashed potatoes, I peeled and boiled 3 huge potatoes til they split with a fork. After draining the water, I dumped them into the Kitchen Aid, added the whisk attachment and enough butter and milk to equal Wisco's annual GDP. Just kidding: probably 3 Tbles butter and 2 Tbles milk before whipping furiously at nearly top speed. The result was potatoes that, as Penny said, looked like meringue or whipped cream.


The co-op has been selling ginormous brussel sprouts, which have recently become a favorite food. I like to roast them with other veggies: acorn squash, sweet potato, onion, garlic, broccoli, carrots. If your sprouts are this big, cut into quarters. For this batch, I started them in the oven with the ham (at 325). Normally, I bake them (drizzled with olive oil, seasoned with red pepper flakes, salt and pepper) at 400 or so, for 30-45 minutes.



Lemony Snisket
Dad likes lemon. He says "snisket" a lot. I like the color yellow and my lemon bars tart.


For this recipe, I followed closely Smitten Kitchen's (borrowing of Ina Garten's) with the exception that I added more lemon. Like more cowbell, it just makes everything better.

Preheat oven to 350, grease a 9 x 13 x 2 pan.

Crust:
2 sticks unsalted butter, room temperature
1/2 c white sugar
2 c flour
pinch of salt

Cream the butter and sugar. In separate combine flour and salt. Add butter/sugar to flour and mix til just combined. The texture will resemble buttery pebbles. Press into pan; flatten into crusty-ness. The recipe advises you to "chill it," but I forgot and it turned out just fine. Bake for 15-20 minutes til lightly browned.



Lemony Goodness
6 XL eggs, room temperature
2 1/2 c white sugar
2 Tbls grated lemon zest (4-6 lemons)--I used 3 Tbls
1 c freshly squeezed lemon juice
1 c flour


Whisk eggs and sugar, lemon zest, lemon juice and flour. It'll be a little frothy. Pour over crust and bake for 30-35 minutes, just after filling is set. Cool to room temperature and dust with powdered sugar.

The bone-in pork-butt spread looked a little something like this:

and this:

BUSTy Blegens

Hiyo!

After appearing in BUST last fall with Sweet Tooth of the Tiger, a renegade bake sale project based in Brooklyn, I was asked to write a piece for the "OLD SCHOOL" feature. Because I invoked Grandma at every bake sale--using her recipes, wearing her aprons, and giggling--it was a great opportunity to celebrate someone who's given me so much.

It appears in the Apr/May 2009 issue and is pretty self-explanatory. I included the crocheted "boobs and dinks" that appear above her; she made similar crafts: flower boobquets, boxer short aprons with a surprise inside, etc (I'll post photos and explanations later).

Shout out to Lisa Butterworth and the other classy ladies at BUST: I owe you cookies!

That Smell: Dinner and Dessert

Penny and I recently suffered an odiferous onslaught every time we walked through our front door. At times it smelled like gym socks, at others fetid meat, at still others rotting cabbage; it wafted in and out, reaching a stasis that was more nuisance than gag-inducing. Baffled, we wandered around the apartment, sniffing every nook and cranny. Both tired (of smelling) and hungry, we decided our time would be better spent masking it with smells delicious to both nose and tummy: homemade lasagna and peach-blueberry pie. Yum-city!

My grandmother was an expert crust-maker; I, however, am not so good.
*Take two sticks of butter, cut them into 1/2 inch slices, place them in a bowl, then freeze them for an hour or so.
*In a medium-large bowl, place 2 1/2 c flour, pinch of salt, pinch of sugar. I used Grandma's sifter to combine them.



*Using a pastry cutter (or in my case, my hands/fingers) incorporate the frozen butter. I like fingers because it feels like you're making a mudpie, but more delicious. The texture should resemble pebbles of differing sizes.
*Add ice water, 1 Tablespoon at a time (usually between 4 and 6 total), mixing (with hands or pastry cutter) until dough holds together.
*Divide the dough in half; wrap each half in plastic wrap and refrigerate for an hour.

For the filling, because my hankering would not mind the seasons, I used frozen peaches and frozen blueberries.
*In a bowl, mix 4 1/2 c peaches and 1 1/2 c blueberries with 3 T cornstarch, 2/3 c sugar, 1 1/2 teas cinnamon, and 1 T lemon juice.
*Remove dough from fridge, roll out into 12" circles. Place first round in 9"pan, pressing down to make a snug fit.
*Pour in the filling.



*Roll out the second round. Place on top.
*Trim to within 1" of the edge; fold the top crust over the bottom and pinch together.
*Brush top with milk, sprinkle with sugar, and cut 4 2-inch slits.
*Bake at 375 with foil covering the edge.
*After 40 minutes, remove the foil and bake for another 20.

When I was younger, my mom would butter the scraps of the crust, then sprinkle them with cinnamon and sugar, and bake them on a cookie sheet until brown: all so that we'd have a sweet snack while we waited for the pie.



Though some of our closest friends are vegetarians, Penny and I savor meat.

*For our lasagna, we browned 1/2 pound of bacon, 1 pound lean ground beef, an onion, and 3 cloves of garlic.
*After draining most of the fat, we added a 16oz can of tomato sauce and a 16oz can of canned tomatoes.
*We seasoned with basil, tabasco, salt, pepper, and some red pepper flakes.
*Penny made a bechamel sauce with 1/4 c butter, 1/4 flour, and 1 1/2 c milk, in a small saucepan on the stove. When it thickened, we added a small handful of asiago cheese.
*Prior to the browning and the rouxing, Penny sliced zucchini, whilst wearing a Lynyrd Skynyrd shirt (inadvertently keeping with the theme).



In the bottom of a 9X13" we placed a thin layer of the tomato sauce. Then lasagna noodles (we got some Barilla that didn't require cooking beforehand). We placed more tomato sauce, then the bechamel.



Followed by grated mozzarella, then noodles, then tomato sauce, then zucchini, then bechamel, then grated mozz, then noodles, then zucchini, and so on and so forth. Since we were drinking, it was hard to keep track of layers. We finished with a layer of zucchini, topped with grated mozz, asiago, and parmesan.



*Cover with foil, bake at 375 for 50-60 minutes.
*Remove foil and bake for another 5-10 minutes, til cheese is brown and bubbly.



For dessert:


Though the yummy smells eventually dissipated to reveal the lurking malodorous stench, Penny and I were too sated to sniff it out.

Pants-less Pizza with Penny

Where I'm from, you feed people to feel people. Some foods say I'm sorry (savory); some foods say I love you (sweets).

Homemade pizza means many things:
*Thank you for accommodating our houseguests.
*I'm sorry they stayed so long, used up all our toilet paper, and drank all our booze.
*I enjoy eating late-night snacks and giggling with you, once the day's stress (and pants) have been removed.


My Kitchen Aid is yellow because it makes everything taste like sunshine. The pizza dough recipe comes from a cookbook and my maternal grandfather, who ran a bowling alley/restaurant. Whenever I make bread, I think of him; I can hear his chuckle over the whir of the dough hook. Sometimes, I make it just to touch: soft like skin, but more yielding.

Mix 1 cup of flour with 1 pkg yeast, 1 c warm water (120-150 degrees) and 1/4 teas salt. Mix on medium for 30 seconds, then on med-high for 3 minutes. Add remaining 2 cups of flour and mix on low til incorporated. Then mix on medium for 6-8 minutes (instead of kneading). Cover and let rest for 10 minutes.

While resting, I start the sauce:


Mom taught us to cook with whatever was in the cupboard in whatever proportions seem right. This sauce is canned tomatoes, tomato sauce, red pepper flakes, fresh basil, dash of sugar, oregano, and a pinch of asiago cheese. Let simmer for at least 30 minutes.

While the sauce simmers, divide the dough in half; it makes enough for 2. Roll each out on a floured surface until about 13" in diameter. Place on greased (and cornmeal-dusted) pizza pan. For thin crust, bake at 425 for 12 minutes. While baking, get the toppings ready, usually about a cup of each.




When lightly browned, pull the crust out of the oven. Smooth sauce over each, then top. Cause I was really sorry, our pizza was overflowing with yumminess: Italian sausage, artichoke hearts, tomatoes, basil, red pepper, red onion, mushrooms, and 4 kinds of cheese: smoked gouda (great on meatless pizzas for a smoky/meaty flavor), asiago, parmesan, and fresh mozz. Bake at 425 for another 10-15 minutes. Wait a few minutes for sauce to cool slightly, remove pants, and enjoy.

Softer the dough, more tender the biscuits...

My paternal grandmother, Mardell, was a fascinating lady. The things people remember most were the mischievous glint in her eye, her ribald wit and craftiness--see upcoming posts for photos and stories--and her delicious baked goods. I've inherited much from her: sense of humor, comfort in the kitchen, and her recipes.

The first recipe, below, is characteristic. Most of her recipes were incomplete. She didn't include baking temperatures or times. Instead, she worked from memory or "when it felt ready." I haven't made these since I was little; my brother tried, many times, to get the missing details worked out, but they never tasted like Grandma's. I do know that the dough was rolled out, brown sugar (and cinnamon?) was sprinkled. The dough was rolled up (jelly-roll style) and then sliced into buns that were placed in a baking pan. After some experimentation, I'll include the results.

Grandma Blegen's "Carmy Rolls"
1 cake yeast in 1/4 c lukewarm water
1 cup scalded milk. Add 1/4 c sugar
2 T shortening. 1 tsp salt.
Mix well. Cool to lukewarm. Sift 4 cups of flour.
Stir 1 1/2 c flour into liquid. Add 1 egg. Beat well. Stir in yeast. Add remaining flour.

Softer the dough, the more tender the biscuits.